It was a Dark and Secluded Area

Not to be outdone by the Lake County Gazette, your LakeCountyEye decided to take a stab at creative writing. Your LakeCountyEye can report that writing prize-winning prose is easier than it sounds, and there are plenty of prizes out there to be had:

The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest (BLFC) is a tongue-in-cheek contest, held annually and sponsored by the English Department of San Jose State University in San Jose, California. Entrants are invited "to compose the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels" – that is, deliberately bad.
Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest

Here is your LakeCountyEye's submission to the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest:

On August 13, six defendants, most of whom have significant criminal histories, decided to come to Lake County with their sole intention to commit a series of residential and vehicle burglaries. In order to commit these crimes, they drove into the county in a stolen Lexus automobile, and armed themselves with a large 10-inch long hunting knife with a stainless-steel blade.

At 1:15 a.m. in the morning, they drove into a dark and secluded area on West Edwards Road, awakening a 75-year-old resident who saw headlights in the area of his driveway. When several people started to walk up his driveway towards a car parked near his home, the elderly resident armed himself with a gun and went outside. The elderly resident had a lawful Illinois Firearms Owner Identification card and was the lawful registered owner of the gun.

As the resident went outside of his own property, he saw multiple strangers approaching him. He ordered the strangers to get off his property and leave, but these strangers continued to advance on him. The resident saw that one of the strangers had something in his hand, and believing he was in danger of death or, at the very least, great bodily harm, he fired his gun several times to try and scare them away. One of the shots unfortunately struck one of the offenders, and the offenders all ran back to the stolen Lexus and drove away.
Lake County state's attorney statement on charges in Old Mill Creek shooting

According to the rules, the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest has ...

several subcategories, such as detective fiction, romance novels, Western novels, and purple prose.
Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest

Which genre would you go with?

Detective Fiction
Romance Novel
Western Novel
Purple Prose

Operatives are asked to vote for one of the above!