High Volume Turnaround Agenda

Mark your calendars, Christmas in July arrived a month early this year. When then-candidate Bruce Rauner promised the voters a lump-sum cash distribution if they elected him Governor, frankly, your LakeCountyEye was skeptical. But now-Governor Bruce Rauner is apparently making good on that promise.

Your LakeCountyEye has learned that the Bruce Rauner Turnaround Agenda^® is doling out substantial gratuities to help give the stagnant Illinois economy a Reboot^® to the rear. Some lucky Lake County residents have already received their checks from Citizens for Rauner, Inc:

Committee to Elect Sheri Jesiel


Committee to Elect Dan Duffy


David McSweeney for State Representative

And it's not just Lake County residents who benefit from the Governor's largess:

Citizens for Pamela J Althoff


Citizens for Matt Murphy


Committee to Elect Michael W Tryon

If you have not received your dividend check yet, then visit your nearest Citizens for Rauner, Inc branch office. Tell the minimum-wage clerk there that you you are eager to help goose-start the Illinois economy, and would like your check deposited in your PAC right away.

Do not delay. This offer may be voided without notice, pending review of the RICO statutes.

A final note:  When the minimum-wage clerk asks for your preference, request the $8000 check and not the $4000 check.  If you are like your LakeCountyEye you will not regret it.