Vote Tardy and Seldom

Is there some election scheduled this week? Haha, if you are like your LakeCountyEye, you overlooked the deadline to request a vote-by-mail ballot. And you missed your opportunity to vote early. And with so many choices to be made on election day, now comes the hard part: what will be your excuse for not voting on Tuesday?

This is not the first time your LakeCountyEye has wrestled with this existential question. Or for that matter, the eighth or even the ninth. Your friends and neighbors and relatives and co-workers may be voting on Tuesday -- but not you. That's because your LakeCountyEye has rolled up ten suitable rationales to explain why you did not vote:

Ten Reasons for Not Voting this Tuesday, November 4

Convicted felons aren't supposed to vote. Voting just encourages them to hold more elections. Forgot to set the clocks back. Stuck 13 hours at a CN Railroad crossing. Voting is how Ebola spreads. My voting location is on the 9th floor of the new Waukegan Court Tower. Got caught in a monster pile-up on the Route 53 Extension. The sign said: No Electioneering Beyond This Point. So I went home. The Sheriff's police have my three pieces of photo ID. It just doesn't pay to vote -- not nearly as much as it used to.

Look for your LakeCountyEye not in line at a poll near you.