Friday, February 28, 2014

Rogen Operative

April 15 is just around the corner and your LakeCountyEye's tax accountant has some unwelcome news. The young man at Liberty Tax Service (the one dressed in a Statue of Liberty costume) said your LakeCountyEye will not be getting a tax refund this year. It turns out that relaying breaking news, investigating unreported scandals, and producing insightful news analyses, all for a free Internet blog, is not a sustainable long-term business model. Your LakeCountyEye did not know that.

Well if that's how the game is played, then LakeCountyEye is going to make like all the other local bloggers -- and from now on will just be reproducing unsolicited press releases, verbatim. Enjoy.
February 27, 2014
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Contact: Lorem Ipsum (202) 000-0000


Kirk, funnyman Seth Rogaine snap a selfie

Show Biz Legend Appears on Capitol Hill to Promote Alzheimer's Telethon; Poses with Senator for Photo-Op

WASHINGTON – U.S. Senator Mark Kirk (Ill-R) and top grossing comedian Seth Rogen were immortalized together today on the Senate floor. A photo circulating on Instagram and other with-it social media websites show the Senator, with a big smile for the camera, standing next to Rogen.

Senator Kirk is standing on the right.
Rogen is a matinee idol who starred in blockbuster comedy movies including The 40-Year-Old Unmarried Guy, Knocked Out and Caddyshack. The Oscar-nominated and Oscar-winning Rogen was in Washington to speak about Alzheimer's Disease before a mostly absent Senate committee. He urged the mostly absent Senators to earmark more research dollars.

After being grilled by the Senate, the appreciative movie star Rogen Twittered:
.@SenatorKirk pleasure meeting you. Why did you leave before my speech? Just curious.
The Senator, whose whereabouts the the time were unknown, was not available for comment.

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Chicago
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Phone: 312-000-0000
Springfield
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Phone: 217-000-0000
Washington, DC
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Phone: 202-000-0000
Look for your LakeCountyEye, in drag, Lady Liberty style, just around the corner near you.

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