Agents of Shields

Here's the setup: Township trustees are poorly compensated, therefore it is often difficult to fill township seats. This is where local businesses see their opportunity. Just pack those seats with trustees who will vote for township projects that benefit local businesses. What could go wrong?

HaHa, it's called the Annual Township Meeting -- where once a year in April, the reins of township government are handed over to the voters:

In a well-attended Shields Township meeting last month, residents voted "overwhelmingly" to strip Shields of the ability to purchase, sell or lease property, according to township staff.
Residents strip Shields Township of leasing power: 'The public made their point'

It's looking like Shields Township won't be making any capital expenditures, at least before the courts sort everything out. One local businessman told your LakeCountyEye: "We might as well just abolish township government, if it can't be relied on any more to spread around the wealth."

Next Week: Townships are required to maintain public cemeteries -- while "cemetery vote" refers to deceased people who show up at the polls. Coincidence?

Hunt Club Park Playground Ribbon Cutting Ceremony and Renaming Celebration

Hunt Club Park Playground Ribbon Cutting Ceremony and Renaming Celebration

All We are Saying is Give Peace Pole a Chance

Overheard during an anti-war protest in downtown Lake Zurich: "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here -- this is the Peace Pole!"

HaHa. The peace pole is the new third rail of Lake County politics:

Ela Township's "peace pole" — etched with the word "peace" in 60 different languages — has become the center of community strife. At Wednesday's Committee of the Whole meeting, about a dozen residents voiced support for the peace pole and more than 30 emails were included in the agenda packet endorsing it and criticizing Trustee Larry Bowman for allegedly raising the possibility of its removal.
Ela Township peace pole becomes subject of community strife: 'Symbol of peace and justice'

Legally speaking, the pole belongs to the Township, and as such the Township would bear any legal liabilities.

One anti-peace-pole partisan said: "It's only a matter of time before the guy who rams into the Long Grove Bridge will ram into the peace pole. And now you're talking to his personal injury attorney."

Operatives are asked to insert their own "10-foot pole" joke here.

Trumped Up

Check out this actual unretouched screencap from the McHenry County Blog:

An untutored choice of words coming from the tinfoil theocrats at the McHenry County Blog -- who, in their defense, are coming from McHenry County. The correct choice of words is: DEI Hires

EtO Power

It is obvious by now that the Trump administration has packed the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration with climate change deniers. When Lake County stormwater managers asked when they can declare a flood emergency, a National Weather Service meteorologist said: "Whatever floats your boat."

HaHa. The rain may have stopped but it may not be safe to go outdoors just yet. The White House has also gutted Biden-era EPA safety restrictions on ethylene oxide emissions:

the E.P.A. replaced the 2024 regulations with a less stringent set. It justified this action by saying that it had been wrong to reëvaluate the risks of ethylene oxide in the first place, because it lacked the authority to do so. Coincidentally or not, the sterilizer industry's trade group had made this same argument in a 2024 legal filing.
Can the E.P.A. Survive Lee Zeldin?

Moreover, companies that didn't want to comply with even those relaxed restrictions could simply ...

apply for exemptions. All they had to do was send an e-mail to the agency. (The Administration described the waivers as necessary for "national security interests.")
Can the E.P.A. Survive Lee Zeldin?

One environmental watchdog said: "An industry member can always voluntarily observe the stronger ethylene oxide emission standards. But don't hold your breath."

Next week: Make America Healthy Again.

Bonfire & Brews: Food Truck Frenzy (21+)

Bonfire & Brews: Food Truck Frenzy (21+)

Not in Kansas Any More

Not content with just carpetbombing the Mideast, the Trump Administration is now photobombing the Lake County Gazette:

Lake County Gazette

All those mugshots are pictures of Dr Mehmet Oz. He is the administrator of the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services. Dr Oz first rose to fame hawking patent medicines on the Oprah Show.

During the pandemic, he promoted the antimalarial drug hydroxychloroquine as a cure for COVID-19. (Dr Oz owns stock in companies that manufacture or distribute the drug.) Meanwhile, President Trump was so impressed he said he was taking hydroxychloroquine himself.

What is Dr Oz doing in the Lake County Gazette (Lake County's #1 fakenews source)? A spokesman for the publication said: "What is Dr Oz doing in the Trump Administration?"

Holy Wars

Today's pop quiz measures how well you remember your history units:

Q: When asked about the Catholic Church, this wartime dictator famously said: "How many tank divisions does the Pope have?"

If you named Joseph Stalin, that was a good guess -- but you are wrong. The correct answer is Donald Trump.

HaHa. Widely considered America's first gangster President, Donald J Trump has now picked a fight with the Pope:

"Pope Leo is WEAK on Crime, and terrible for Foreign Policy," Trump posted on social media. In other interviews, the president said, "I'm not a big fan of Pope Leo. If I wasn't in the White House, Leo wouldn't be in the Vatican."
Column: President Trump targets pope in latest crude attack

Soon afterward, the State Department issued a travel advisory against visiting the Vatican City: "Hostile military operations shall commence there momentarily."

In related news the Mayor of North Chicago recently had an audience with the Pope:

North Chicago mayor part of delegation meeting Pope Leo XIV: 'I asked him to pray for our city'

Soon afterward, the State Department issued a travel advisory against visiting North Chicago: "Hostile military operations shall commence there momentarily."

Betty Russell Community Park – Concept Design Reveal & Feedback

Betty Russell Community Park – Concept Design Reveal & Feedback

Holy Smoke and Mirrors

An actual unretouched screencap from the Lake County Gazette, Lake County's #1 fakenews source:

The Arts & Entertainment section of Lake County Gazette is chock-full with notices of Mass times and other religious services. This in effect lumps together religion with other forms of entertainment, such as sports betting.

The Lake County Gazette does not ordinarily wear their heart on their sleeve like this. That is because the content you read on the Lake County Gazette is generated by Russian troll farms, and Russians prefer to wear sleeveless shirts:

Telnyashka

A spokesman for the Lake County Gazette said (translated from Russian): "Our editorial board regards this as a step in the right direction. These stories used to be published in the Business section of the newspaper."

A Fuel and its Money are Soon Parted

Question of the Day: How is a $5 coffee like $5 gasoline?

Answer: A $5 coffee will give you gas. While $5 gasoline is a cuppa Joe -- as in Joe Biden, the person responsible for the $5 gasoline:

JD Vance savagely attacks Joe Biden when asked about record gas prices

HaHa. Gas is way too expensive to spend idling your non-EV at a Lake County red light. Consider instead a Lake County roundabout, where your idle time is reduced to zero:

Lake County's affinity for roundabouts continues with three more to be built this summer
3 roundabouts in Lake County's 2026 construction program

For the record, 2 roundabouts are being built along the Wisconsin border.

A spokesman for the White House said: "If you run out of gas there, just flag yourself a lift from a border security vehicle."

Small Change

Pop Quiz! But no worries, in observance of Spring Break this one will be a stroll on the beach.

When this person became the chair of their political party, the opposing party dominated Lake County politics. The majority if not all of the County, Township, State and Federal offices were held by members of the other party. But since then, this indefatigable chair not only managed to stem the tide but completely reversed the fortunes of their moribund political party. And now that party dominates Lake County politics. One final hint, this county chair will not be seeking re-election. Can you name this person and their party?

The correct answer is, of course, Keith Brin, chair of Lake County Republican Central Committee. Brin disclosed his decision not to seek reelection to lead his party ...

on Wednesday, giving the respective precinct committeepersons time to evaluate potential replacements before their April conventions.
Lake County Democratic and Republican parties seeing changes in leadership in April

For the record, Keith Brin was a candidate for committeeperson in his precinct and lost. As a consequence, he is not be eligible to be Republican Party chair:

Note to Ops: No law says necessity can't be sold as a virtue.

The 23 Skid

It has come to your LakeCountyEye's attention that there was a Primary election. Who knew? Not your LakeCountyEye.

Who won? Not the Republican Party. The GOP vote clocked out with a scantling 23% of total Lake County ballots cast.

This may not bode well for the Lake County GOP's General election prospects. An Illinois GOP spokesman nonetheless was upbeat: "23 percent is nothing to be ashamed of. I would be overjoyed to see a 23 percent return on my crypto investments."

Their low turnout, apparently, can be attributed to 2 factors. Unlike Democrats, Republicans do not vote by mail. And the price of gas kept those voters away from the polls.

An Illinois GOP spokesman who is different than that other Illinois GOP spokesman who was let go, was upfront: "If President Trump can send ICE agents to airport security checkpoints, then he can deploy the US Postal Service as well.  US Post Offices will all be shut down during the period starting with early voting and up to the November election.  And your mailmen will be exclusively tasked with shuttling Republican voters to the polls. STOP THE STEAL!"

Bunny Bash

Bunny Bash | Gurnee Park District

Get It in Writing

Sharpen up your #2 pencils because you've got another Pop Quiz:

Q: How do you spell: ELEANOR SWEET MCDONNELL?

A: ELEANOR SWEET MCDONNELL

And you will need that #2 pencil tomorrow if you plan to vote for McDonnell. She is on the ballot as a write-in candidate:

Eleanor Sweet McDonnell and Joseph Salvi are facing off in the primary, with McDonnell highlighting her track record as North Barrington village president and previous work in politics, while Salvi frames himself as part of a new generation of Lake County Republicans. Despite McDonnell's lengthier political resume, she's running as a write-in candidate, a situation she attributed to political "shenanigans."
Lake County Board candidate alleges backroom 'shenanigans': 'It wasn't a conspiracy,' incumbent says

Why is Salvi on the ballot for County Board District 17, while McDonnell is a write-in? Some believe there was a backroom deal between Salvi and retiring incumbent Michael Danforth:

The Lake County Board seat of outgoing District 17 member Michael Danforth — a prominent Republican voice on the largely Democratic panel — has generated some election controversy, as the write-in candidate has accused her opponent of backroom deals with Danforth.
Lake County Board candidate alleges backroom 'shenanigans': 'It wasn't a conspiracy,' incumbent says

In his defense, Danforth says everything was on the up-and-up. And while Salvi's political resume may be thin gruel, in his defense Salvi can claim to be the son of the Chair of the Illinois Republican Party.

A spokesman for the Illinois GOP said: "Nothing to see here. Move along."