Curses, FOIAed Again

So, you got a burning desire to knee-cap the Deep State, but your name is not Elon Musk. Do not despair. Turn off that chainsaw, and fill out a FOIA request, instead.

As readers of this blog are aware, the Lake County Gazette had weaponized the FOIA by soliciting files from no fewer than 25 Lake County police departments:

Mob FOIA

Well, the Lake County Gazette is at it again, this time spamming no fewer than 50 Lake County Village governments with FOIA requests:

Lake County Gazette FOIA request sent

What does the Lake County Gazette want? They want from each Village, "access to all emails sent by the mayor or president over the past 30 days." They also want "a fee waiver, citing their role as a media professional involved in disseminating information."

Their goal is obvious: to rummage through your local Village's business while neglecting the fees. This is known within the craft as Sniff and Stiff.

The FOIA information obtained will, nodoubt, find its way back to the same Russian troll farms that concoct the content for the Lake County Gazette (Lake County's #1 fakenews source). Lake County Village administrators are advised to learn some basic Russian.

Run Short

Have you ever had this awkward conversation? They come into your room and say they have bad news.  They say it is going to have to be shorter than was originally discussed. And you say, how much -- an inch shorter? And they say, no, 1000 feet shorter.

Well, if you're the Waukegan Airport, that may be good news:

A proposed runway improvement project at Waukegan National Airport will be 1,000 feet shorter than originally envisioned, requiring only a sliver — rather than 52 acres — of neighboring forest preserve property. That's welcome news for the Lake County Forest Preserve District commissioners, who won't have to decide whether to sell a hunk of the Waukegan Savanna Forest Preserve for the project
'Great news for everybody': New runway plan at Waukegan airport minimizes need for forest preserve land

The runway issued a statement, through a spokesman: "It's not the length that is important -- it is the width."

The Pen is Triter than the Sword

Besides writing laughable ledes for political blogs, did you know that AI can also be used to draw political cartoons? That, at least, is how the Chicago Tribune Creepy Cartoonist™ does it.

First ask the Chatbot to dig up some forgotten old painting, in the public domain:

Then ask DALL-E to make a drawing from it, using a sharpie:

Privacy doesn't exist.

And finally, voila, two thumbs up!

Close to Transportation

Did you hear the one about the city where the real estate was so expensive they had to build their airport underground? The idea had one serious drawback. Anyone who wanted to get to the airport had to ride the subway.

HaHa. An airport in Cook County recently obtained land that had been a demolished Ramada Inn:

Prospect Heights officials have approved a redrawing of the property line between an office building and the site of a recently demolished hotel to enable construction of eight hangars at Chicago Executive Airport.
Prospect Heights approves land swap enabling hangars to replace hotel at Chicago Executive Airport

In related news, the Ramada Inn in Waukegan was also recently demolished:

Column: With razing, Ramada site opens door for new life

Note to Ops: Please make up your own Waukegan Airport joke here.

No BS

Here's a fun fact: The "D" in Ty-D-Bol stands for Democrat.

It's the God's truth, if you believe the McHenry County Blog, who says the Democrats have potty mouths:

Potty-Mouthed Democrats Stimulate Editorial Cartoon

There is one Democrat whose cuss words the McHenry County Blog will only abbreviate:

That Madigan is not all about power is absolute BS.
"Madigan Is Not about Power" Really?

What does "BS" stand for? Bill of Sale? Bomb Squad? Box Score? Boy Scouts? Barbra Streisand? It's anybody's guess. You may as well try asking the President of the United States:

Trump Reveals 'SURPRISE' For Putin; Loses Cool Over Ukraine Killings | 'Bullshit...' | Watch

Travel advisory: When you're in McHenry County, be careful where you step!

Sounds of Summer Concert – “Disco Circus” (FREE)

Sounds of Summer Concert – “Disco Circus” (FREE)

Go to Pot

If you want to live to 100, then follow this rule. The rule is simple and -- now that the Trump budget will cancel the health insurance on 17 million Americans -- truer now than ever before:

You can never be too rich or too thin.

Of course, barring either, you can always opt for being too high. Particularly, when in Mundelein:

Mundelein expands available dispensary licenses ahead of proposed pot shop

For the record, Mundelein is home to the State's only annual outdoor cannabis fest. Why? Because Mundelein.

Note to Ops: Be sure to stockpile your prescription meds and medical marijuana now, before the federal government takes away your Medicaid.

WTF

The tinfoil theocrats at the McHenry County Blog are freakin' out, and not because it is gay pride month. No, it's because Illinois Democrats have been heard dropping F-Bombs like they were in Iranian airspace:

Still another Ililnois [sic] Democrat thinks it's OK tl [sic] use the "F" word.
Another Illinois Democrat Breaches to [sic] "F" Word Barrier

Being situated in urbane McHenry County, the McHenry County Blog is no-doubt unaccustomed to the barnyard epithets sometimes uttered in other precincts of the Prairie-State. They are advised to limit their coverage to national politics, where the discourse is more refined and measured:

DONALD TRUMP GOES OFF using the 'F' WORD on IRAN-ISRAEL ceasefire violations

Note to Ops: Pull your tinfoil cap down over your ears to block out all of those unwanted F-Words.

Sounds of Summer Concert – “Billy Elton” (FREE)

Sounds of Summer Concert – “Billy Elton” (FREE)

The Road Not Taken

So a guy is lost and ends up on the Amstutz Expressway. He stops at a gas station to get directions. He says "How do I get to Chicago?" The cashier says "I couldn't tell you." The guy says "OK, how do I get to Milwaukee?" The cashier says "I couldn't tell you." The guy says a couple other cities and each time the cashier says "I couldn't tell you." By now the guy is annoyed. "Do you even know where we are?" the guy says. The cashier looks at the guy and says "Son, you're on the Amstutz. You can't get anywhere from here."

HaHa, true story.

The rest of the world may know it as the Road to Nowhere, but you call it the Amstutz. And now, throwing redundancy to the wind, the City of Waukegan will be shutting down the Amstutz Expressway next week for a movie shoot:

Regular Waukegan City Council Meeting
7_00 PM - 06-02-2025

In related news, the Long Grove Bridge is on the move and will be relocated to the Amstutz Expressway. A spokesman said: "If anyone can find the bridge there, they are welcome to crash into it."

The Hits Just Keep on Coming

Stop your LakeCountyEye if you've heard this one before: So, some guy who is driving a truck crashes into the Long Grove bridge.

HaHa. In related news, some guy crashed into the Long Grove bridge:

Water is wet. The sky is blue. Someone hit the Long Grove Covered Bridge again.
Long Grove bridge hit by moving truck, allegedly for the 67th time

In related news, the village is working to sanction a NASCAR track -- one that would go under the Long Grove bridge. One spokesman said: "Most people go to these stock-car races to see the crashes anyways. It's a win-win."

Be the YOU You've Always Been

This is someone you know, a friend or relative, even. He wants to pass for normal and presents an identity well within the bounds of convention, but secretly knows it is a deception. Until one day he cannot go on living the lie -- and he comes out, proclaiming his true nature.

Your LakeCountyEye refers to former Republican Congressman Joe Walsh. Lake County GOP favorite son Joe Walsh says he is now a Democrat:

Joe Walsh, who previously represented Illinois' 8th Congressional district as a Republican, said Tuesday he is becoming a Democrat
Former Illinois Rep. Joe Walsh says he's becoming a Democrat

Of course, one does not simply switch parties -- from Republican to Democratic -- just like that. Mr Walsh is currently being held at an undisclosed location in El Salvador, while Immigration and Customs Enforcement processes the paperwork.

Aim for the Stars

The McHenry County Man who shot himself in the foot is lucky to be alive. That's because the McHenry County Man who discharged his weapon in the direction of River Road (in McHenry) discharged his weapon in the direction of River Road (a busy thoroughfare):

McHenry man accused of firing gun to ‘scare’ woman faces new charge he shot at ‘busy’ road

The McHenry County Man who shot off his mouth declined to comment.

Nothing Secesses Like Secession

Dust off your Confederate monuments, today's quiz tests your knowledge of the Civil War:

Q: Which legal precept enabled West Virginia to secede from the State of Virginia in 1863?

A: Because West Virginia.

HaHa. And no doubt with dreams of being the next West Virginia, this group of Republicans want to secede from the State of Illinois:

New Illinois, an organization that wants to create a state separate from Chicago and urban Cook County, drew about 60 people to a meeting Saturday at the Palatine Township Republican Organization office.
'New Illinois' supporters meet in Palatine, discuss urban-rural divide

For the record, Palatine is a township of Cook County; Palatine also is a village that straddles both Cook and Lake counties.

Downstate GOP separatists warn that Palatine residents would not be permitted to secede along with them: "Trump administration directives are clear. All Palatinians will have their visas revoked and will be deported."

THC TBD

The final exam, this term, covers sociology. Those who fail will be held over for summer school:

Q: What's the difference between a drunk and a stoner?

A: If driving, a drunk will crash into the Long Grove bridge. A stoner will stop and wait for it to turn green.

HaHa, and chances are both would be on their way back to Mundelein.

In related news, they want to build another cannabis dispensary in Mundelein:

A few weeks ago, representatives of Terrabis stood before the Mundelein Village Board discussing their proposal to turn a former bank building into their newest cannabis shop location.
Mundelein home to latest example of evolving cannabis industry; 'If moms are using it, it's legitimate'

Is there room in Mundelein for another cannabis dispensary?

One homeowner told your LakeCountyEye: "Is the new Pope Catholic?"